So today was an odd day. I feel like I saw at least three people I went to high school with with their wedding pictures up from last weekend. I saw a guy I considered dating get engaged to his gf of what seemed like a very short time. I get this weird feeling seeing all of this blowing up on my page. I sit there and think I'm so glad that's not me and I have no feeling of needing to be at that point in my life. I'm glad that it didn't happen and this realization took a long time to come to. I'm extremely happy with my life even though at times it gets frustrating. I like definitions, I like to have a title or not to have a title but at least know where the lines are drawn. Yet, I think about it and I don't want to ever push someone to define something that is going so well. I fear that if I push it'll just ruin it all, however, myself keeps saying "push, you want to know". So what do you do? I'm making a change and I'm just going to go with it. I'm happy and that should be all that matters. I'm sitting at home tonight dogsitting, watching How I Met Your Mother and I can't help but laugh. They're talking about change and as we get older it's inevitable.
I have changed so much not just in the last two years but in the last couple of months. I figured out my next move in life, Nursing School. I just know that I have one thing that I really want to do in my life and that is to help people. I realized how much I missed Nicaragua and how much I want to go back there and be able to contribute in a huge way. I want my life to be adventurous and fun and with absolutely no regrets. I want to find someone who wants that same thing and wants to share that with me. I'm making this happen with or without someone. The one thing my mother always wanted was to make sure that my sister and I were independent. While my sister may not be, I am and I will make the things I want to happen happen.
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